When a pension fund emails to ask if you're starting to think about retirement. Oh, how I laugh!

Songs That Changed Music: Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick

Had a good day today. Lots of music in my head. Drank too much last night, and dealt with it by carrying on this morning. Sat in the park opposite #, but unlike @Kat MCP(NT4) MCSE(Win2K) I completely failed to score. This park is defective! I batted my gorgeous eyelashes and everything!

A good, short, slightly tipsy shift at work laughing with/at my colleagues. Feeling positive for the first time in a long while.
what a stylish hat and waistcoat! ❤️
Thank you sweetie.

The hat is a $20 paper fedora. I always wanted a roll-up fedora like Peter Davison had in Doctor Who, but it turns out they cost around $400. It would be cool to be able to roll up your hat and casually slip it in your jacket pocket, but in a climate where it's barely cool enough to wear a jacket for about a fortnight in late July, this isn't a killer feature.

The waistcoat I bought when I was twenty years old. Within a year I was too fat and horrible to fit in it, though I kept it for sentimental reasons. Now finally it's a bit roomy, if anything.

The ensemble is undermined by the fact that everything else is three sizes too large, but I'm determined to wear my fat clothes down to rags before refreshing my wardrobe. The shirt hangs down to my knees. I'd tuck it in, but my trousers are fastened just below my armpits.

I'm making comical sexy. How I don't get propositioned in the park is a complete mystery.
Ruben friendica
looking very debonair and fancy free, keep it up

Been # the Avengers at teatime. Within the first few minutes of episode 2 of series 2, there's Geoffrey Palmer and Nicholas Courtney! Telly nerd heaven!
Ruben friendica
the Brigadier! And Geoffrey Palmer, a lovely actor here he is with the delightful Dench out boating

I once worked with a guy who told me he'd only ever been overseas once. To #, and he'd never go back. You could not get a sausage roll anywhere.

I smiled and snorted, but when I looked at him his face was set grimly earnest. That was his line in the sand.

To be fair, it's not as though he'd expected a Chico Roll, or a Streets Golden Gaytime.

# #


Just got myself a beauty while shaving. The sort of injury that leaves me with no option but to henceforth pursue a life of crime and become the nemesis of some superhero or other. On the plus side I'll get to wear a cape. Always fancied a cape.
Ruben friendica
@Matthew Davidson
I got suckered into buying a fancy electric shaver a couple of years ago. I still have no idea how it happened. The purchase coincided with my decision to henceforth go bearded.
Ruben friendica
@Matthew Davidson
What about an eye-patch and a hump? On second thoughts, maybe the hump would be overdoing it.

@Ruben Always respect the power of the majestic turtle.

YouTube: Turtle Chases Lions From His Waterhole (Kruger Sightings)

Ruben friendica
That's brilliant. Hank would do the same

@Ruben Can't beat a good support group:

YouTube: Reeves & Mortimer - Hernia Hotline (Darren Rigby-O'Neill)

Oh, it hurts when I laugh.
Ruben friendica
Hello my name is Ruben and I have a hernia named Quato.
That is disturbing. Never saw that film, and now I never will.

Damn. Just had today's shift at # cancelled. All up, this week I've done half the hours I needed to cover rent and groceries, and I've a monster electricity bill due. There has to be an easier way to make a pittance.

It's a lifelong struggle.

My electricity bills have been punishing ever since I moved into this flat. Today I finally did what every good consumer in a privatised and deregulated market should do, and went comparison shopping at the sarcastically-named

Turns out that based on my kw/h consumption in my last bill, I could save as much as $20 a quarter by switching to a cheaper provider. After the $20 switching cost. Six months in, that's a cheap bottle of wine's worth of pure profit every three months!

F**k #. Where's when I need it?
We Want EVERYTHING! 🌹 reshared this.
I think the actual problem is that the meter for my flat is in a room behind a locked door, behind the laundry, bearing a sign saying "This door must be kept locked at all times." (I think the "Beware of the leopard" sign must have come loose.) So all my bills have been guestimates bast on the last genuine reading which, based on the available evidence, would have been during the tenancy of somebody who was living here among steaming server racks, mining Bitcoin.

When you're young you have practically nothing to say, but desperately want to say it to the entire world. When you're old you have a lot to say, but you only want to say it to a few people.

Over dinner, was # Sorry We Missed You. As a precarious worker who has to make a small device go beep at frequent intervals, it was probably unnecessary.

Ruben friendica
Love Ken Loach, he's bloody brilliant


I think professional athletes should stick to politics. #

My god. It's full of green. #

Cornwall, April 2011
Ruben friendica
Sigh.... Yes
Ruben friendica
Looks like the view from Penrose walk from Helston to Looe Bar. Incidentally Jan Tregeagle was said to have created Looe Bar as one of his given tasks to provide protection from the the hell-hounds dragging him back down below.

Landlords should be required to provide sick leave.

Day off. Feeling sick and sorry for myself, set about # movies in my queue. First up: Where's My Roy Cohn.

Woah. Don't think I have the stomach for more.
Finished last night's movie binge by watching Casablanca all the way through, rather than in bits while flicking though the channels on a Sunday afternoon in the 1980s. Full to overflowing with witty badinage, but the plot is surprisingly insubstantial: "Fugitive couple briefly stop in Morocco en route to Portugal," about covers it.

Nobody fills out a trenchcoat like Bogart, but his range is a bit limited - arguably limited to not acting at all, just saying the lines while looking cool. When asked to stretch, what he produces is practically semaphore. As a shallow, dissolute youth I would have identified with Rick, but at my age, I am totally on Team Victor. Much more interesting and naturalistic performance.

Nowhere near as cinematic as I expected. As a film, Casablanca is a good night out at the theatre. It's funny and lovely to look at. Fine craftsmanship; no surprise so many subsequent films look and feel so like it.

See also
Ruben friendica
@Matthew Davidson
African Queen appealed more to me but then I am more of a boat person.

Lots of glass-smashing again today at the #. Glaziers and handymen are at work on the unit which a couple of weeks ago my neighbour Breaking Bad trashed before doing a runner. That must be satisfying work; arriving at an almost completely ruined apartment and finishing the job, before restoring it again to working order, ready to be trashed again. Rather like setting up dominos to be toppled or building a wicker man. The impermanence of the result somehow makes doing a splendid job more satisfying.
And the guy who initially put plywood boards over the windows has come back to reclaim them. Reduce, reuse, recycle FTW!

The year-and-a-half long battle to get my address details changed with # continues. An hour on the phone just now, about the same a fortnight ago, and also a week prior. Assured that the changes just need to be manually checked (by unnamed shadowy authorities), and everything will be done in a few hours. Heard that before.

How is it so hard to execute an SQL query? I'm not even claiming any benefits!

Is there a team of skilled artisans painstakingly chipping away at blocks of marble in ornate characters to record my once-new address? Are they at work in some enormous cloistered quadrangle while smartly-dressed call centre workers with headsets and tablets stroll past, saying things like "I'm just getting your details now, sir," and brushing aside tendrils of ivy to reveal delicately gilded data?

Paths winding between flower beds and decorative hedges of aromatic herbs lead this way and that, meeting at spectacular fountains tinkling with what callers assume is merely static on the line. Small reptiles bask in shafts of sunlight from the heavenly crystal dome above, lazily eyeing the butterflies which circle the hanging flowers about the rotunda where plays a roster of the most gifted string musicians of our time. On the chairs about the bandstand sit an audience of headsets placed there by workers before taking a break at the cafe or spa ("I'm just going to have to put you on hold for a moment, madam.")

On the green, young new hires recline on picnic blankets, rolling dice. "We are currently experiencing a higher than normal volume of calls due to the…" [Rolls dice, consults lookup table] "floods. If your call is not urgent…"
Kat MCP(NT4) MCSE(Win2K) reshared this.
I have been trying to get my name changed on the council bill for 5 years ..
the website consistently addresses me cheerfully by a long forgotten moniker.

Hello Alan
Welcome back Alan

the council tax comes for Alan too.. I say I'm not paying for him anylonger, but they keep sending him the bill, and taking my money.
The conservative mindset doesn't get, or doesn't want to get, the difference between a variable and an identifier.
Ruben friendica
The Dole/UB40/Centrelink/Welfare machine was built in the 18th (or was it 17th) century and it's been working fine ever since. No one is going to rewrite the code for some moaning bloody end user. They tried doing that after the second world war and look where that got us, bloody NHS and votes for women!? There is hundreds of years behind that code! Are you mad?

The Easter AirBnB'ers have arrived at the # and the flats next door. The air is thick with the screaming of children; excited squeals and disconsolate wails. Not to mention loud public displays of dysfunctional parenting: "Right! That's it! No Easter Bunny for you!" "Waaah!"

Ruben friendica
I'm definitely booking my next family holiday at Aloha. I know you're just trying to make paradise on earth sound bad to keep it for yourself.

Hm. I see that after Cory Doctorow's departure last year, Xeni Jardin's name has now also disappeared from the shrinking list of editors in the footer of the # home shopping blog.
Ruben friendica
I can't believe she stuck around for that long

"There are people who have a lot more dignity than us who are very worried about getting old, and I don't see any reason why we couldn't, uh, you know, take a few bucks off of 'em. To help."

"Of course to help. And you know to the extent that we can merchandise the experience, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, except I mean ethically."

# # #

Failed in my plan to spend my day off at home, spending no money. Walked up to work to buy a bottle of wine, then down to Bogan Bay to watch people walking their dogs on the sand bar at low tide, splashing around in the shallows. Not as relaxing as a good window seat in a city pub, but through a steadfast refusal to check the time or fret about what I should be doing instead, my cerebrum got a pretty good cleansing anyway.
Ruben friendica
Don't worry it was temporary pretension. I'm back on the XXXX Goldie's in my undies and thongs tonight and I skipped the washing up. Instead I sat on the veranda swatting flies.
Ruben friendica
The turtle loves squashed flies, especially if they're still twitching

My drug dealer neighbour Breaking Bad has had a big day. I heard a bit of banging and crashing this afternoon, but thought nothing of it as somebody has been moving in a few doors down. Renovations, I presumed.

Then it escalated into smashing of glass. Quite large panes of glass, by the sound of it. Hmm. Serious - and radical - renovations, then. Unusual, but still somewhat plausible.

Then shouting and swearing, more banging and crashing, and I did what one should never do here at the # if one wants to avoid getting a bad reputation, I looked out the window. Other, newer neighbours who don't yet understand Aloha etiquette were showing signs of consternation, thus relieving me of the dilemma of whether to call emergency services.

The boys in body armour duly arrived, knocked on Breaking Bad's door, and went away again. Some time later, the banging and crashing resumed. It's just now getting dark. Wonder what's next from my now windowless neighbour.

# #
Thought, f**k it, I'm going down the pub for a beer I can't afford. On discreet passing examination, the security grilles on Breaking Bad's windows are now all buckled outwards.

When I got to the pub, the footpath outside was all unsteadily swaying floral dresses. Saturday night, innit? Worst night of the week for a civilised drink.

Went to the surf club to look at the sea instead. Still there. Full moon, high tide. So that's another year till I need check on the status of the Pacific Ocean.

Home again. Early start and long day at # tomorrow. Just downloaded the recent Shane MacGowan biopic, and was going to save it for a special occasion. Nah, it's time. P45, cracks in the ceiling, curry stained mattress, sound of a bedsit, sound of a bedsit…

Ruben friendica
Living the dream...

The Mundi Mundi Bash:

IMHO, go for Paul Kelly, Tim Finn, and Vika and Linda Bull. Hopefully there's a beer tent.
Ruben friendica
that's excellent, thanks I can make myself a playlist so I can at least sing along with everyone else. I really hope there is a beer tent. Australians are getting quite puritanical these days it might get replaced by a coconut water and latte tent
Ruben friendica
Well, I was serious when I offered to buy you a ticket. C'mon we have a flat you can stay in and everything...

@treageagle I'm sure this is stone age technology now, but… Only one way to do a presentation slideshow:
Ruben friendica
Oh yes, that's the one. I can't believe I forgot it. Nor can I seem to find any of those whizzbang slideshows I made as an undergrad... Probably a good thing.

Rain lashing and wind howling about the wine cave this evening. Only three hours # today. Got drenched commuting both ways. The playing fields opposite # railway station were hosting an avian tattoo; serried ranks of ducks and ibis, shoulder to shoulder, sploshing and pecking their way across the marsh. Shame not to have the floodlights on and some stirring music to accompany such a well-drilled body of birds.

# #

Spectacular. Unbelievable foley work.

Luke mastodon (AP)
also how cool is that bowling alley??
Ruben friendica
That's ridiculous.

Okay, went to play with # 9, just on my desktop PC. /var/www is empty, apart from the # placeholder page. Funny.

# In the whole time I've had this now-rusting old computer, I've never once used it for any web development! It's not the only thing that's rusty around here. #

I thought I heard a rustling…

Ruben friendica
Re is showing me pictures from her social feed of submerged houses from back your way. Have you got water frontage yet? That'll make the rent go up.
Yesterday was a bit dicey. I'm used to wading home in the afternoon/evening, but this was the first time that it was so bad by noon that getting upstream to # made me empathise with salmon. When I got to work I emptied about a cup of water from each boot.

Just drizzle today. Even saw the sun a couple of times. More big falls over the next few days, but there's no big tides till the end of the month, so no prospect of flooding. Pity. Could have done with the excitement, Would have made the daily drenching part of an exciting narrative.

By Wednesday it will be "Bono estente, nimbo cumulous. Bono estente scorchio!"

A lot of young men in baseball caps and baggy shorts stopping by Breaking Bad's flat for very animated discussions over the last couple of afternoon/evenings. Supply chain issues, I expect. # # #
Ruben friendica
An opportunity? Just get yourself some tinfoil and make up sachets of kitchen products. This could be your big break. Psst, mate ... Want some 'O'? Oh Ray Ganoh?
I wish I had reason to believe his clients and resellers were after something locally grown and reasonably benign. Although maybe I could tempt them with some Himalayan Pink.

# the final episode of Adam Curtis' latest. Two hours. Blimey.
Ruben friendica
Remember to get off the sofa when the dancing footage comes on that way you'll avoid pressure sores
That's what those are for! I thought they were just the "[Insert relevant footage]" placeholders that were still remaining at deadline.

This also explains most of 1970s television. In a half-hour programme, you never had Jon Pertwee or Tom Baker suddenly turn to camera and say something like "And now, ladies and gentlemen, here are the Nigel Flatworm Dancers, with their special guest Nancy Twining."

But that _always_ happened on shows that went for the full hour. Thank heavens someone's still looking out for we couch potatoes.

Not happy. Three hour shift at # turned into eight, which - financially - was nice. Got home around 9pm famished, put the oven on, and then the lights went out. Save for emergency lighting, not a trace of alternating current visible in the neighbourhood. Sat in the dark, listening to a podcast on my phone and snacking on frozen peas for an hour. 10:30pm, electricity has been restored, and I can start cooking dinner.

Sleeping in tomorrow. Stone me.
Ruben friendica
# tune in next week as @Matthew Davidson distills Ararak from his own urine
No distillation necessary. I was so cross about how late I was kept up by all of this that I was still seething and drinking at 4am. Got new batteries for my torch today, despite the fact that candles are much cheaper. I daren't pee near an open flame.

Upgraded my desktop to # 10 ("buster") last week. It is, of course a thing of great beauty.

Of course I never made a note of where to find the driver source for my crappy # USB # thing.

#: works like a dream

Tom reshared this.

Content warning: People who know me well (i.e. @Ruben and… that's pretty much it, really), will testify that I'm not in the habit of posting photos of gents lavatories on the Internet, but these are exceptional times.

In the dilapidated shipping mall where I #, whenever it rains more than a slight drizzle, the publicly-accessible part of the shop turns into an obstacle course of plastic bins catching rainwater. Back of house, it just rains indoors in patches, and we work around it.

In the staff gents, much of the suspended ceiling has collapsed, and water just courses down the walls, through the walls (knocking out a power point and electric hand dryer), and eventually down the drain in the middle of the floor, which backs up anyway after more than a day or two of rain.

Arrived at work to find a man up a ladder there replacing ceiling panels. This activity struck me as more than a little Sisyphean.

It had just started raining, and rain is forecast for the next week at least. These panels, as did their predecessors, are just going to get sodden, sag, and collapse into the pond below. Unless centre management are going to fix the roof, and they are not going to fix the roof because they never have.

However, it turns out there is a grand plan, and a dashed cunning one, at that:

Basil reshared this.
Houston, we have a problem.

Basil mastodon (AP)
oh no
Luke mastodon (AP)
Wow not seen such a bodged/jerry rigged job as that in a LONG time!
Jamie mastodon (AP)
I am equally impressed and horrified.

Dvd Mrsdn mastodon (AP)
reminds me of the time the council put the gate in our communal garden area back on its hinges.
Ruben friendica
Oh, this is gold. I can't wait to see what's next. It reminds me of my own impov programming (?)skills.

"Watson, you will be interested to hear that I am engaged to be married."

"Oh yes. Jolly good."

"To the Milvertons' housemaid."

"Good heavens."

"I need information."

"Surely you've gone too far?"

# #

Cold front has finally arrived in #. Not fast enough for my liking. I just want the sweating to stop! #
Ruben friendica
Strangely cold out here too. I have an ear infection which I am treating with paracetamol and whiskey.
Careful: I've heard paracetamol can be bad for your liver.
Ruben friendica
Finally had enough of the throbbing ears today and visited the doctor. She was delighted to get out the syringe and hose those waxy bastard fur holes clean. The chunks that came out were astonishing. Now the ache has gone and I can no longer ignore people who talk to me.

Had a big bag of bad attitude this week. Just couldn't get ahead. Hoping the coming two days off work will make a difference. In the meantime, I'm going to stay up late drinking, listening to music, and killing simulated living things in old computer games. Bah!

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